Unexpected Melancholy Night

I rarely write when I feel down, sad or upset, but once in a while, I will have that urge to do it, just to make me feel better inside. Tonight, that urge was pushing pretty intense I decided to write something.

It is kind of funny though. I remember two years ago I had my kind-of-broken-heart after I realized that what I expected could not be reality. Fortunately, it was cured in relatively short time. I guess I was not into that person so much.. I think I was more disappointed rather than broken-hearted. 

Two years later, I am experiencing the same thing. 

I do not know if I indeed fell in love with this particular person, but I know I could not get him out of my mind since the first time I met him. It is not usual for me to think too much when I meet a new person even though I am attracted to him.

But this person…

He somehow makes me want to be a better person.

He somehow makes me want to learn more my religion and be a good moslem. 

He somehow makes me want to learn many things, to ensure I have the same level of knowledge as his. 

He somehow makes me want to push the boundaries, thinking about living outside Indonesia.

And when I knew he has someone else in his mind and heart, my heart was and is still aching. 

So can you tell me, did I fall in love with this person?