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In A Journey to Becoming A Mom (2): Pregnancy Experience

Similar like other moms-to-be, during pregnancy I have been experiencing different changes in my body. My body strength, for example. Because my office is located outside my hometown (~60KM), I get to do 2 to 3 hours trip every day from and to Surabaya. Luckily I have a driver which helps a lot because I can get some sleep in the car. However lately I feel very tired when I arrive at home (commonly I arrive at 7.30 – 8.30PM). When I am tired, usually I don’t feel the need to eat, which is bad, because I need to eat regularly to make sure the baby is healthy.

  • I urinate more often than I used to be. This is mainly because the blood flow to the woman’s kidneys increases by up to 35 to 60%. Passing urine frequently can also be influenced by pressure on the woman’s bladder from her growing uterus (source).

pregnancy cartoon 2(Picture source: Pinterest)

  • Both my feet and hands are swollen. Actually it doesn’t hurt, but it creates uncomfortable feeling especially because I could not feel my hands normally. It’s quite difficult to grip something properly when you feel numb in your fingers.

pregnancy cartoon 3(Picture source: Pinterest)

  • I have difficulty to sleep at night, particularly after entering second trimester. The reason could be different time to time, for example I could have shortness of breath, tummy discomfort, or simply because too much thoughts in my head. Though it is not uncommon, but better habit could help in reducing this issue (source).

Hasil gambar untuk insomnia pregnant woman cartoon(Picture source: Pinterest)

Beside these top three “issues”, I have some others which were also disturbing but not as bad as those three. Well, on second thought, the irregular heartbeat was actually pretty intense… but I will share this topic in next entry. For sure this pregnancy experience will continue, and who knows? Maybe I will gain new experience(s) in the following weeks 🙂

 

 

 

 

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Welcome My Little Nephew!

This morning I received a wonderful news from my sister who is currently living in Japan. She gave a birth to a healthy and beautiful baby boy! I am super happy and excited to welcome the new member of our big family. My other sister in Jakarta already have two boys, so now the “Boys Club” increasing with a new and also youngest team member 😁

While I am thrilled about this news, in other hand I start to think about my next plan. Somehow becoming a Mom looks way more important now rather than being a working lady who no longer has an energy and true passion on her job. I think I need to consider of finding a new job that fits my passion and also give me the flexibility to enjoy my motherhood. Let’s hope I can get the answer soon ☺️

For now, welcome my little nephew! 😍❤️

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In A Journey To Becoming A Mom (1)

Having realized that I am now entering my fifth month of pregnancy, I regret a little bit for not writing anything in my first trimester. This overall pregnancy experience has been so far exciting yet also nerve-racking, since it is my first baby and well, I am not that young anymore. I know that it is not uncommon for women who are in their 30s to have a baby, but still they have more risk compared to those who are still in their 20s.

The fact that I am 33 years old and expecting to deliver my baby when I am almost 34 makes me thinking hard. I have mixed feelings about my situation. It is somehow unavoidable for me to worrying about the pregnancy itself and also the delivery process later on. I have never been a person with a very fit condition, considering I lack exercise and also rarely eat any fruit or veggies. I’m trying to change during my pregnancy by eating more veggies everyday (we book daily catering for breakfast), but I think I can still eat more fruits to boost my stamina. In addition, I try to drink more water. I must say I have some bad habits that can affect my and my baby’s health *sob*. It’s a homework for me to continue pushing myself in making myself better for my baby.

While I am genuinely happy with my pregnancy, I must admit sometimes I think about my life before today. Being a normal person as I am, I can’t help myself thinking about how my current limitation to travel like I used to be with my big belly. I get tired easily, and become quite moody once in a while. Unintentionally I will be a bit jealous when I see some Facebook pages of my friends that show their last vacation trips somewhere.

When that happens, I usually reflect on myself and revisit again all my thinkings. Yes, maybe it will be more difficult to me to do what I want to do now compared to when I was still single. But now I am having one of the greatest time of my life. Becoming a mom is one of my life plan’s goals, and I am on journey to get there. On top of that, it’s not like I cannot do anything at all when I have children later. I just need to adjust my expectation and my plan, then it should be manageable.

There are still months before my due date, and I think I will be learning more during the pregnancy and after having my baby. It will be a long, challenging yet amazing journey ahead, and I am excited embracing it in my life. Please pray the best for me and my little one ❤️

(Picture from Goole image: https://goo.gl/images/oqeEis)

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I Am Still Alive!

These past couple of months have been quite tough for me. In a short: my life plan was pretty ruined. Okay, maybe “ruined” is a strong word… let’s just say it didn’t go as planned. If you recall my last entry on April (or June?), I mentioned about my plan on looking for new opportunity outside my company, to have a new start and focusing on what becomes my passion. In reality, I could not get that other opportunity outside the company, instead, I got somehow-an-opportunity still inside my company.

I have mixed feeling about my new role in Ag department. In one side, I am pretty excited since it is related to people, social matters and sustainability which I fond of. In other side, I have been having hard time with my supervisor and I don’t like the current management style.

After thinking for some time, I decided to give this role a try considering my interest and passion. In addition, I have good team mates which I could rely on and ask support from. It has been tough and I have been overwhelmed, but I tried my best to catch up lot of things at once. I get tired easily since I am pregnant (this will be another story), and the change of moods also doesn’t help with the overall situation. Even worse, my supervisor which I have been worrying about really shows his true color and slowly brings the team’s motivation down. There were points where I am not sure if I want to continue this job with this current situation.

I am really considering on what I should do next, as the realization of becoming a mom is sinking deeper and deeper in my brain. I know I can’t keep being stressed out and pressured in the office every single day if I want to be happy, if I want my family to be happy. I just hope I can get the answer fast for the sake of my family and me. Wish me luck.

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What? Two Months Hiatus Already?

Honestly I was forgetting this blog for a while for a reason which I am trying to understand. Commonly I will remember to make an entry in beginning of June since it is my favorite month (I was born in June, of course…). However I completely forgot (or was too lazy?) to write down anything, including short stories which I planned to create regularly. I think I am currently in a “confused” state, even though I am not too sure what I am confused about.

I suspect this is somehow related to the fact that I just moved to different department in May. As mentioned in my previous post, I was not happy with my last job even though I got a promotion along with the position and responsibility. People could say that I was stupid and did not take the opportunity well, but I guess if someone has already not been happy with his or her current situation regardless the reason, it will be difficult to convince the person to believe that she or he needs to work on that and eventually she or he will be happy in the end of the road. Nope. It does not simply work like that.

Anyway, long story short, my former boss realized I was not happy since I was completely demotivated. Bad performance score. Another opportunity emerged for me to stay in the company in different function – in fact, it was my favorite function before. His comment which I clearly remember was, “This is your last chance. Make it or leave it.” Quite a statement for any employee who needs a job to pay his or her bills regularly, not to mention any active installment.

But here’s the thing: I was not afraid to leave the company back then. In fact, I was actively looking for a job and almost landed an interview with a good company (somehow they did not call me back, sigh), so my boss’ statement back then did not make me afraid. Sure, I still need the job because I haven’t got a new job yet, but I was at the point where I did not care if I was jobless for a while. Nevertheless, I think in the back of my head, I was genuinely concerned, though in the same time I was pissed off on the overall situation. That situation made me feel uncertain and unmotivated, and in the end becoming lazy to pursue my passion and my goal.

Two months waste of time. I wish I can turn back the time, but I cannot.

I need to be more stable and revisit my life plan. I guess this happens because no proper monitoring on my life plan in monthly basis. It is a hard learning, and I hope it will not be repeated in the future 😦

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I’m Back (Again)!

I just realized that I have been neglecting my blog for the last two months. Ugh. I promised myself to write more regularly but seems I still could not keep my promise. I guess it is my homework to somehow make it works; maybe having a writing schedule will help since I will be forced to write. Let’s see!

The last two months have been quite challenging for me, though it’s getting calmer nowadays. I have been considering a major decision I might take in my life, and in the end I have committed to do it, but unfortunately, I haven’t got the opportunity to do it yet. Now I am waiting for the opportunity to come, hopefully in the near future. I am just afraid as time goes by, I will lose my sight on this target, and get carried away with current life flow. Being in comfort zone could be as bad as not doing anything in your life. You get so used to it, you don’t even want to think if there is something wrong or need to be changed in order to achieve bigger target or objective in your life. It’s a bit shame, but just couple of months before, I did not think about leaving comfort zone at all. I loved it, in fact, I was so afraid on what could happen if I dared to take the risk, regardless of what I might get if I take it instead.

Comfort Zone Quotes - A comfort zone is a beautiful place, but n

After revisited my life plan in January, I understand that I cannot stay longer in my comfort zone. Of course, I cannot just blindly change and leave the comfort zone without a plan. I still need to review properly things that I want to do and risks associated with it. As per today, I notice that my plan didn’t go smoothly as I expected. Therefore I need to think about another scenario which will be applicable for me. Still some homework needs to be done, but I am excited and nervous at the same time. Hopefully everything can go well as per planned. Wish me luck 🙂

That’s all for now. Will post review on Black Panther and Dilan 1990 in the next few days. Until then!

 

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Hello Again, Life Plan!

Few weeks ago I finally met my dear friend who just moved back to Indonesia. We worked together in the same function when he was still in the company. In the beginning I had difficulty to understand him and, well, I was a bit afraid of him. He was (and has been) a very straightforward, perfectionist and really demanding person. Though it was quite overwhelming in the beginning, eventually he and I became good friends, and he often gave me some advices especially related to work.

When I thought that our reunion would be a nice, kind of funny meeting since we will remember our colleagues who already moved or retired, he (of course) turned the table around to me. Demandingly, he asked me about my Life Plan and how it progressed.

I was stunned. Honestly, even though I wrote few posts about revisiting my life plan, what I did really just considering a small part of the plan and included it in my to-do-list. Somehow I forgot that Life Plan is not as simple as a plan to buy new mobile phone or to go traveling during holiday break. I need to spend some time and put my energy in finalizing the plan because in the end, this Life Plan will help me to achieve my goals in life.

And that’s the key word: my goal in life. My Life Goal.

What is actually things that I want to achieve?

What is my passion?

Am I living it now?

If I am not living with my passion now, do I plan something that will ensure I will be doing it in the future?

These questions popped out in my head when I opened again my “dusty” Life Plan, and oh man, I was really nervous. I created that file three yours ago with the help of this friend of mine and it was with assumptions that I will achieve some of my milestones in one or two years. Means I should have achieved something in 2015 and 2016….which were in the past.

In short, I kind of wasting my two and half years’ time, letting myself carried away by the flow of life. I was a bit disappointed, but not too much, because I personally think the two years difference is still somehow okay-ish. Sure, I need to change my goals now and maybe speed up my efforts to still achieve some of my mid-term goals, but somehow I think that is still reasonable. Better late than never, that’s what I keep telling myself.

So now, I have a big homework. Not only I have to revisit my Life Plan and fine-tune it based on my current condition, I need to also work with my hubby to have joint Life Plan since both of us are an item now. I am glad that Rendy (my hubby) got a chance to meet my friend and got some short induction about the concept of Life Plan. I think both of us agree that Life Plan is indeed important, and that we need to prepare one for our family moving forward.

Wish us luck! 🙂